I’ve screwed over my best friend

by | Health, Life, Productivity

Dear Intuition,

I’m so sorry for ignoring you.

I am sorry for being a shit friend.

I grew up in a world that told me that you either didn’t exist, or that listening to you was dangerous. But the truth is, you are brimming with wisdom, and had I listened to you, my entire life would be in a very different place.

I would probably be in a different place.

You have been the forgotten, overlooked presence, a patient & persistent friend woven throughout my entire life. All those times I thought I was listening to you, but was mistakenly roped in by the sinister, clever voice of fear, sneaking in through the back door of my mind. And all those times when I was blindly seduced by a sweet, honeyed voice that was cleverly disguised as you. And what about those times when I knew exactly what you said, but chose to intellectualise, to blindly fight against you?

If life is an adventure, a maze of sorts, I have done nothing but run aimlessly from one ruined road to the next. I’ve become dizzy in all the dead ends streets I have woken up in, working in circles and never moving forward. But you are the way forward.

I have not paid enough attention to your mysterious ways. You are a woman of few word’s, but I have not accepted this about you. Instead I have demanded more clearer, logical answers of you in order to take you seriously. But you are who you are. That’s not how you work.

If there is one thing I do know, it’s that when I do listen to you, there is a flow, and peacefulness to my life. I am not struggling against the Niagara Falls of life with a tiny shield, instead I am flowing blissfully along with the direction of the current. Things just WORK. I know that you are a quiet, steady & patient advisor, always available, displaying unconditional love. It’s me who has overlooked you.

I have take you on a rollercoaster ride, a long and arduous journey. I can’t erase 36 years of ignorance, but I can begin to nurture our friendship, as you are the most important friend I’ve ever had and will always have. A friend for life.

It has taken me so long to trust you, I have trust issues to be sure! I ask once again for a piece of your endless patience, whilst I start to walk this journey with you, wobbly baby legs and all. Yes I will probably make mistakes, but I will listen to your quiet nudgings, your still, small voice and I will study your subtle ways, so that I never misinterpret you again.

I am humbled at your feet, and down on my knees pleading that you can find forgiveness in your heart.

My heart is heavy and my eyes are stinging with tear’s.

But this heavy heart belongs only to you now.

Today, everything changes.

It’s time to start a fresh.


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1 Comment

  1. Maryanne

    This sounds common, we all do this I think.


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